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Writer's pictureDeborah

Adoption Was My Option, and I'm Sticking To it...



I have always loved the feeling of mothering. From the time that I was a little girl playing with my dolls, I have been fascinated by the idea of loving and nurturing someone outside of myself. For various personal reasons, throughout my life I have worked with many organizations that sought to improve the lives of children. Those connections stirred up a desire to not only become a licensed foster parent but, to walk the path of foster to adoption.


When I imagined creating my family, I did hope to be able to conceive a child naturally. I went through what seemed to be a lifetime of attempts to do so, including fertility treatments, but God had different plans. Instead of dashing my dreams, this simply catapulted me into fostering.


Here’s the thing about being a foster parent: it is designed to be a temporary solution until children can be reunited with their parents. Many adoptive parents seeking permanency shy away from this process for this very reason. It’s the fear of getting attached to a child only to later have to return them to their family. That feeling is very real, but not one that stuck with me. My convictions were extremely strong that this was the path for me.




Others also tend to encounter the same few fears and questions when it comes to fostering and adoption. Like:

  1. Do I have the capacity to love someone not biologically connected to me?

  2. What will happen if a birth mother changes her mind?

  3. Will my family and friends be supportive of my decision to adopt?

  4. What if the child has special needs that I didn’t anticipate?


Each of these is very valid and normal feelings to experience but there are so many resources available to help out with them. AdoptTogether has compiled a great list of resources for adoption planning and general questions.


For me, I began with one agency that didn’t seem to be the best fit; which led me to One Hope United. The right agency will make all of the difference in your experience. I will never forget the day I received the call for a newborn baby boy who I would soon know and love, Joshua. Although the process was all a joy, please know when things got hard, I leaned into my faith to carry my through.


My path to him wasn’t straight but it was a set of perfectly coordinated events in my life starting from a seed planted in childhood that blossomed into the relationship that I have with my son today. I can only hope that by sharing my testimony of faith and obedience, others can elevate their prayer request to create a family no matter what the means. I encourage you to remain faithful as that brings about fruitfulness.




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2 Comments


AVID Parent
AVID Parent
Sep 11, 2023

I heard your story on the radio. Wow!!! I've had my child since they were 4 months old. It is definitely possible to love someone (a child) that is not biologically yours. I've told my child that they are adopted several times, they do not believe me. I figured they were not ready or do not care. Either way, thank you so much for putting the information out there. Best wishes on your journey💓

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sgtronsmithjr
Dec 09, 2020

❤❤❤❤

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